Mother's Day

It's spring here in Colorado! We have been enjoying the tulips and daffodils, the green grass, and all the a-MA-zing smelling flowering trees... I love spring because when God's creation "wakes up" at this time of year, it reminds me to reflect on how amazing life is. I especially love our life because we have God at the center of our family now. I can't imagine life without the Lord ~ He is real, He is personal, He is powerful, and He is active. He is always there with us.

He blessed us with our son, Josh. Today is Mother's Day, and I love being a mother. I think back on the 6 years we have had Josh in our lives, and I can't remember life before him.

Five years ago this month we started trying to grow our family. Josh was 14 months old and had just stopped breastfeeding. I was still working as a 911 dispatcher part-time. It feels like a loooooong time ago in some ways. Trying to grow our family has stretched us and taught us some hard lessons and we have gone through some really really rough times. Our marriage felt like it was on the rocks at times. I was so so so ANGRY at God. Why give us six babies only to take them away? Why not just let us NOT get pregnant at all? Why not take away the desire to have more children from our hearts?

We have not been successful to this point at growing our family physically ~ there are still only three of us in the house ~ but we have grown so much closer to our Lord. He is a God of amazing grace and forgiveness and love beyond what our pea-brains can even imagine. It is only NOW after all the heartbreaks and difficulties and challenges that we have some perspective. (That 20/20 hindsight thing, eh?) He is with us through our hard times and during these hard times is when we grow closer to Him.

Yep, that's us.

He had to break us in order to build us up in Him.

So he didn't take away the desire to have more children because He has a plan. His plan for us is two munchkins on the other side of the world. This most assuredly was not our first choice and we probably wouldn't even consider adoption if we were able to have more biological children, but God knew that. I will also be forever grateful for the miracle of our biological son. He is a miracle gift from God. Now that we're here in the middle of adoption-land and getting closer to meeting our new sons we know this is exactly how our family was meant to grow. And with our perspective, we know yes we finally get to have more kids but we also know this is so much bigger than us. We see a little more of the big picture, a little more of His plan, but certainly we're seeing just a glimpse of His story. And we're OK with that. We love where he's taking us with this new life of ours.

Because, really, who wants to read the last chapter in a book first?

Happy Mother's Day to David and Samuel's China moms. We will always remember you and your sacrifice and your gift to them and to us. We know you wanted a better life for your sons, one that you were not able to give them. You chose life for them, and we pray that you have peace in your hearts.

And Happy Mother's Day to me since I am going to be a mommy again ~ twice!!!

Thank you, Lord!!!


2 Corinthians 12:9-10  But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.