School Dilemma

Choices.

Choices are good.

In our culture, we seem to have SO many stinkin' choices. For example, have you paid attention at the grocery store lately? Really - do we need 312 different choices for what flavor juice we want? Cranberry-grape vs. apple-strawberry vs. cranberry-apple-orange vs. pomegranate-cranberry-peach??? Do they really taste that different?

Choices.

We have choices of where we can send our kids to school.

I don't really remember this from when I was a kid. I know there were some kids who went to the local Catholic school. But it seemed then you just sent your kid to your local elementary school, and then they continued to the local junior high, and then to the local high school.

Today we have home elementary school vs. private school (secular and religious) vs. charter school vs. homeschool vs. open enrollment at an out of your area school...

So many choices. Sometimes I want to opt out. "Can someone just tell me where to send my kids? Where they will do the best? Be the happiest? Learn the most? Be taken care of and loved on and nurtured?"

I have been praying. Asking God for clear direction. Crikey, so many prayers lately for clear direction.

So here is our dilemma. We have a great home elementary school. People rave about how they love it and oh, aren't you lucky to be in THAT school's area... Yes, we are! So when we were registering J for kindergarten, we decided to try to send him to a charter school near us. We love the curriculum at the charter school (let's call it "C-school") and it has a great reputation and great test scores. Much better test scores at C-school than at H-school too. And we figured if Josh didn't get in during the lottery system, we would be no worse off sending him to our home elementary school (let's call it "H-school") because that is a good school too.

We got Josh in on the first round of the lottery at C-school. We figured that was where he was supposed to go.

So after Josh started kindergarten, we heard rumblings about how there were problems at C-school. Parents were not happy. Teachers were not happy. Families were leaving. Teachers were leaving. But we didn't see any of this. Well not much anyway. Perhaps because we were in our little very-early-elementary cocoon or something? And there were families that we spoke to who were happy with the school.

Josh's kindergarten teacher was a nice enough person, but, um, not a fantastic teacher. Unenthusiastic. Not particularly fun. No positive reinforcement for the kids, just a LOT of negative. But Josh did OK and he made friends and he learned in spite of her. Many parents complained about her to the administration. I was shocked that she worked there for a second year.

So Josh started 1st grade and his teacher was FANTASTIC. Like the kind you want your kid to have every single year of his life through post-graduate school. She was a gift directly from God, and she restored our faith in C-school.

...Thinking back, there was one incident early in the 1st grade year that still makes this Mama Bear ticked off if I think about it too much. At the beginning of school, Josh was understandably having a really hard time. We were gone for weeks to China, and had just gotten home one week before school started. You know the first week home is all about jet lag and screaming newly adopted kids. Josh was crying a lot at school, which was disrupting the class ~ especially his first period music class. The classroom teacher was working with us to help Josh. So on the 4th or 5th day of school (I was still in jetlag-land), the music teacher had Josh out in the hallway and the dean walked by. From what I can tell, Josh's classroom teacher was there too. The dean saw Josh crying and started yelling at him. Telling him that if he didn't stop, he would be sent to the office. Telling him to cut it out. It went something like that (since I wasn't there), but the classroom teacher told us that she thought the dean came down way too hard on Josh.

Here is our the C-school mission statement:  C-school..." provides students with the foundations of virtue and character, building cultural literacy through a rigorous, content-rich curriculum in an encouraging environment."

Hey Mr. Dean, so much for creating an encouraging environment. Way to go modeling good character. You really sucked at it that day that you dealt with my 6 year old.

But our most awesome 1st grade teacher continued to work with us, and Josh soon did really well and thrived in her class. He was excited every day to go to school, and would come home happy after school.

Isn't that what we all want?

So now that we are in our 3rd year at C-school, we are seeing more why we hear parents and teachers have been dissatisfied. Josh has not been particularly happy. He doesn't come home happy after school, and isn't super excited to go to school like he was in 1st grade. Before 2nd grade started, the 2nd grade teacher Josh was supposed to have left. Like a week before school started. So Josh's current teacher was officially hired THE DAY OF BACK TO SCHOOL NIGHT. Yikes. He has been doing a good job, and got his classroom together in record time. When I see him in the class he handles the kids well though many of the kids are disruptive, and he teaches enthusiastically. Of course the skeptic in me asks if that is just because I am in the room... but anyway, Josh continues to learn. He is quite an advanced reader and mathematician. And I am not just making that up to brag on my kid :-)

So has Josh been doing well and continuing to learn because of C-school and his education there?
Or because he is naturally a quick learner and has a love of learning?
Or because Jason and I have the philosophy that we are our kids' teachers first and it is OUR responsibility to teach them?

So in the meantime our two munchkins are in preschool at H-school. And they love it. And their teachers love their job. Like LOVE love their job. And the school environment there is loving and nurturing. And the staff turnover is very very low. And people even walk around H-school smiling.

My thinking last year was that we were just at H-school for preschool, and then we were moving the boys over to C-school. I did not get that invested in H-school. I didn't get to know the other parents much, didn't attend any meetings or (sorry to admit this since the munchkins' fantastic teacher reads our blog hehe) didn't pay much attention to school happenings that were outside the preschool class. Now since we have been questioning C-school, I have been paying closer attention this school year to H-school, and I realize it is a great school. For more reasons than test scores.

So Jason and I have been having this dilemma... WHERE SHOULD THE KIDS GO TO SCHOOL? especially now that D needs to register for kindergarten.

Our concerns for D were based on our experiences with C-school, as well as the fact that we want D to be in a nurturing environment. He tends to shut down if he is overwhelmed, and he will never learn if he is not in a nurturing environment.

So....

Out of the blue and unsolicited... (does this sound like a God thing to you?)... another preschool parent who also teaches at H-school approached me. She said that she heard we were going to register D at C-school, and she wanted to strongly suggest that we think about H-school for him. This parent used to teach at C-school too. She talked to me for a half hour straight about her experiences as a parent to her own kids at both schools, her insight since she has been on staff at both schools, and the rumblings she is still hearing from C-school. That's all the detail you will get about my conversation with her here. Let's just say it was eye-opening.

We are going to register David at both schools, and keep praying.

What would you do?

(((hugs))),
chris

As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.
             Proverbs 27:17


So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.
             1 Thessalonians 5:11